Beyond “So, What Do You Do?”: How to Keep a Conversation Going on a First Date
The first date jitters are real, and few things are more anxiety-inducing than the dreaded silence or the feeling that you’re stuck in an interview. A great first date isn’t about being perfectly witty; it’s about being genuinely curious and using simple techniques to transform a basic exchange into an engaging dialogue.
Here’s a guide on how to keep the conversation flowing smoothly and meaningfully on a first date.
1. Shift from Interrogation to Exploration
The quickest way to kill a conversation is to ask a series of closed-ended questions that only require a “yes,” “no,” or a one-word answer.
| Stop Doing This (Interrogation) | Start Doing This (Exploration) |
| “So, do you like your job?” (Yes/No answer) | “What’s the most surprising thing you’ve learned in your job?” (Requires a story) |
| “Did you grow up here?” (One-word answer) | “What’s one thing you miss about your hometown, and what’s the best part about living here now?” (Creates a comparison) |
| “Do you have any hobbies?” (A list) | “What’s a hobby you’ve picked up recently that you’re really excited about, and why?” (Focuses on passion) |
The key is to use Open-Ended Questions that start with “How,” “Why,” or “What if.” These prompts encourage your date … READ MORE ...
