Boys Into Men – Sometimes You Just Have to Stop and Ask For Directions

Boys Into Men - Sometimes You Just Have to Stop and Ask For Directions

The guy who divorces his wife, gets a hot girlfriend and buys a red Corvette is a hoary but oft repeated stereotype of a man going through a midlife crisis. It’s unclear what comes first, the girlfriend or the sports car but that doesn’t really matter. I work with men going through mid life transitions and to my knowledge, not one of them owns a sports car. My ideal client is the guy who is a little afraid to ask for directions but he can do it. Hardly typical, I know.

Just about every man goes through some kind of mid life transition between the ages of 35 and 50. What they get out of it is entirely up to them but when they go through it is not often their choice. A mid life transition can be as gentle as feeling a little uncomfortable to a full blown identity crisis.

Let’s start with the full blown identity crisis shall we? A surprising number of men I work with claim that they do not feel like men at all. They feel like boys dressed in men’s clothing who act like men and who talk like they think men should talk. Somehow the line between childhood and being all grown up was never traversed. Men in this predicament have a very profound fear that they are going to be found out and exposed, as if someone will rip off their mask and find the scared boy masquerading in a suit and tie.

At some point these men/boys get fed up pretending and want to get real. The only problem is that they have been pretending so long, they have no idea how to be real or how to be a man. Typically, before they stop to ask for help they medicate …

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7 Secret qualities of men discovering heat

7 Secret qualities of men discovering heat

Yes, we usually open books for almost all women around. Or so we let you think;) Seriously, there are usually a few things you can know about us just by glancing at us, but there are SOME secrets that we keep among ourselves, especially when it comes to relationships. Despite the sheer number, here are 7 “secrets” that make a woman very attractive to us.

1. Intelligence: Perhaps the number one misconception is that all men look for girls who are stupid and easy to lie. Indeed, sometimes we are what we are looking for, depending on the opportunity (we are not looking for a wife at the club.) However, what we are really looking for 90% of the time is women who are intellectual matches with which we can talk (talk ?! !?) Yes you read that correctly, we really want you to be smart, it can even be on if you are smarter than us. Just don’t let anyone know we said that!

2. Personality: “He has a great personality” is the guy’s code for “He’s ugly but …” That’s true, but in reality we want you to have a great personality; it completes the package. Just like you want a man who makes you laugh, we want a girl we can laugh with.

3. Not Going to Sports: An 8 hour potato with a bag of Doritos in one hand and beer in the other is a stereotype that is overused. Sure, some of us like soccer, baseball, or F1, but many of us don’t like sports as a whole. If you don’t like sports, that’s good for us.

4. Seen: Megan Fox, Jessica Alba, Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie; it is widely regarded as the symbol of a perfect woman. Although it’s hard to deny that women …

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